Communication.

Sometimes I feel like my parents just don't understand. While there are times when I could just sit with my mom in the car all day and talk about the world. Excluding certain things, of course. It's hard to have to sneak around, knowing that what I'm doing is terribly wrong, but if she just gave me enough freedom, she could almost be my best friend. Last time I ran away, she said "You AND your sister. You always treat us (meaning her&dad) like we're such idiots, while all we do is raise you so that you'll have a better future than we ever did." Of course she said it in our language, but it really hit me. It didn't stop me from going out the door, but I pondered on it for a while. And "for a while," I meant from then til now. My mom always rants on about how her parents were a hundred times stricter, and so were her brothers. When her brothers found out she's been with a boy, they hunt him down and whoop his ass and make sure he tells everyone so that no one ever bothers to come near my mom. It worked, til my dad came into the picture. He did get his ass whooped by my mom's brothers, and his whole family did tell him to stay away from her. But look where they're at now. I want something like that. I want a guy that will stay by me for the rest of my life, through EVERYTHING, and even if the relationship thing doesn't work, he'll still be there my whole life, as a best friend. Then I'll know he's my soulmate. No, I wouldn't have been married to my soulmate, but who ever made the rule that soulmates are lovers? So I'm guessing that that's why my mom wants me to wait for the "right guy." Of course I have dated a handful of guys already, but I know where she's coming from. My dad is her only "serious" relationship and it looks like she chose the right guy to stay with, and to fight for. But what I'm trying to say is, although its tough to listen to my parents, and it's tough to understand why they're so strict, at least I know it's for something good. I mean, that's thoughtful of them, but how can I claim that I have actually lived my life if they don't let me make my mistakes? Advice would be fine, just so I don't make mistakes that will ruin my life. But telling me not to get pregnant everytime I go to the movies is just going to annoy me because how in the world does anyone have sex at the movies? Keeping me locked up at home and not letting me go out whenever for no apparent reason is unfair and it's just going to make me not like my parents. I wouldn't be disrespectful if they had respect for me. So Mom, Dad, I'm sorry for lying. And yeah, I'm sneaking around behind your back 80% of the time. But you have to forgive me. 'Cause I forgave you.